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Writer's pictureLouise Smallbone

Appeal the Appealing: Approbation

Approbation (formal )

Approval or praise.

[OED]


What do you praise? Likes on a picture? The amount of followers you have? The Snapchat streaks?


See the thing is, and the problem I have with this mindset, is that in the end none of this matters. These do not have any intrinsic value in life. Likes can't fix an addiction. Followers can't settle your inner turmoil and depression. And Snap streaks won't heal a broken heart.


What does fix all this is love.


Now I am coming from a Christian point of view and will say that God is the God of love. Nowhere in the Bible does he say we are people of fear, he says we are a people of love. But I am not here to preach, only to say that our default state is one of love. That's scientifically proven, and if you don't believe me read neurological papers or watch this sermon by Dr Caroline Leaf ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqQoJRoZj5Q ).


Our default state is one of love.

So how do we change our mindset? Well, the first thing you have to know is that it won't be easy, and that's key, it will take perseverance and self-control, but we are people with free will and it can happen. If we are determined enough we can achieve anything. It takes 21 - 63 days to create a habit. Now I know what you're thinking: my dentist told me to floss everyday and I kept it up for a week and then I stopped and haven't done it since. And yes you're right: habits take time to get into.


However, and here's the good bit, for the first week you can spend one and half a minutes a day thinking about love and joy. That's 90 seconds. Even less time than brushing your teeth. Even the busiest person in the world can spare 90 seconds of their day to be thankful for things. Just put your phone away, turn off your computer and music and simply sit and think for 90 seconds about what you are thankful for. Maybe it's little things like, I'm thankful that I didn't burn my toast this morning or thank you that I am inside when it's pouring with rain. Anything. Because by the end of the week you can look back and think of all the things that work in your favour and realize that life really isn't that bad. And suddenly you're praising the goodness of your life, rather than living in judgement and fear. Because that judgement and fear is exacerbated by our obsession with social media. At the heart of social media what is it about? Popularity. Instant gratification. Perfection. Lust. Greed. Pride. Selfishness. I could go on and on. We have become infatuated with being connected with everything and everyone digitally that we have in fact become disconnected with our reality.


Suddenly you're praising the goodness of your life, rather than living in judgement and fear.

Steven Furtick says that we live in an age of anxiety and I think he hit the nail on the head. We are controlled by technology and not by ourselves. How many of you reading this now look at your phone last thing at night and first thing in the morning? Yep, me too.


The first iPhone came out in 2007. It's been 12 years since smart phones have become not just an accessory but a necessity. It's an extension of our physical being. Who can't leave the house without their phone? Or even worse who can't even go to the kitchen without their phone? Can you see a pattern now? Can you the danger that our society have driven themselves into?


12 years. That's it and our whole being as a global people have changed, and changed drastically. We rely on our phones for our communication, calculation, information and valuation.


It's been 12 years since smart phones have become not just an accessory but a necessity.

But I believe it not's too late. It will take work and it will take time, but every individual is strong enough to find their worth in true love rather than in the double tap love heart emoji.


90 seconds a day. I challenge you.


Note: This series is not here to criticize social media or those who use it, but rather hope to provide those who want to change their lifestyle or lessen their time on social media with ways in which to do so.

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